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Articles avec #meanings tag

Hallelujah! means something else in Romanian

Publié le par Charly C.

Hello all!

This is a short entry, and I want to talk about a cultural shock I had last year, regarding the use of the word "Hallelujah!"

In English, you'd say "Hallelujah!" when something good happened, or when something you hoped for turned out the way you wanted. 

You'd sometimes say "Hallelujah!" to perhaps mean 'Finally!"

In Romanian, though, "Hallelujah!" is used to mean "What's done is done."

It is usually said in bad situations - when you lose or break something, especially something expensive or that you cared about, for instance. 

So, last year, I shook the sheet on the window. Below, at the ground floor there is a commercial space and they have some sort of shades, made of metal, that stand out and away from the building, in a horizontal position. 

If things fall there, they can't be easily retrieved. 

My sweatpants were wrapped in the sheet, and I grabbed everything. 

Before I could do anything, my pants fell from inside the sheet and onto the shade-thing of the commercial space. 

A told their mother, and her reply was "Hallelujah!" 

The shock! the horror! I was wondering, why is she so happy about my misfortune?!? 

It appears she wasn't: she was just telling me to forget about my pants. 

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Unconditional love and its issues

Publié le par Charly C.

Hello world~~~

I just watched a short video in which a (very wise) rabbi was talking about why unconditional love is problematic. And I agree with him. 

My earliest memory of hearing about "unconditional love" dates to several years back. I was visiting a forum dealing with spirituality. I came across this term in the section called "twin flames" (like soul mates, but apparently the bond is stronger - I just call it "special snowflake"). In a nutshell (and generalizing), the users (mostly women) posting here were obsessed with a specific man who entered their lives at some point in the past. In most cases, the man either had no idea or was simply not interested in the woman.

If a man came and posted a similar story, well his story seemed to receive less attention or he received a lot of criticism. Also, almost everyone was labeling him a creep. the women posting a similar story? no! they were considered normal, received a lot of support and encouragement.  Double standards to the maximum! 

What I never understood is what exactly they understand or mean by "unconditional love." After hearing the rabbi talking, I finally understood almost everything. I'll post the video first, and then I'll go a little deeper into my reasons of thinking why "unconditional love"  (as a term) has problems and so on. 

NOT my video

As you can see, according to the rabbi, telling someone "i love you unconditionally (no matter what you do)" disregards the person, their personality. You also force your emotions or feelings onto them, and if they don't feel the same ... you appear as a creep, selfish (you decided how you're going to feel, and nothing can change your mind).. 

Now, I've been thinking about it. I can't see how people CAN think that they "love unconditionally". There's always a condition the person or the item MUST meet in order for you to feel anything towards them/it. And I'll give you a few examples next. Unconditionally comes from the word condition, which in many cases is a cause for something. 

You hear many women saying they want to become mothers. If you suggest they adopt, they'll flat out refuse no matter the arguments you bring. Their main reason to refuse is that "they can't see themselves loving the baby/child the same way they would on who grew in their bellies, who shares their blood." It's clear that many mothers love their children BECAUSE they gave birth to them. Giving birth is the condition a child must meet, to receive their mother's love. 

You can say there are many women who love their adopted baby/child. Not going to deny that. In this scenario, she loves him because she generally loves children and REALLY wanted one. She might also find the baby really cute, and I have yet to find a person who DOESN'T like/love cute people or items. Getting used to living with or caring for some alive creature can also lead to loving them. 

You'll also hear people saying "I love (ITEM) so much because it...". BECAUSE! And yes, they said they love an item. This simply means they're really happy to own the item, BECAUSE -it makes their life easier; or it's of a really good quality, and they won't have to buy another identical (similar) one any time soon, or because it's a status symbol (shallow reason, but still a reason). 

Unconditional love and its issues

Now, I should mention that "love" is a pretty strong word and feeling. This is why in some Asian countries, you'll be hard pressed to hear anyone saying "I love you" or "I love this (thing)." They'll say instead "I really like you" or "I like you a lot." You'll often hear these people saying that "love" is a word they'd say to their significant other, on the death bed. 

Looking at a situation in this light, I don't think anyone would say on their death bed "I love this (ITEM)" but they'll say they love their children, partners, friends maybe. in this light, you can safely assume these Asian people would actually say "I really like this ITEM" and never "I love the item." This is something WE (Westerners) should also do, if our languages allow it. I am doing it. I started using less "I love/I hate....." a couple of years back. I still feel like saying these words, so I'm not perfect. 

I also think that some folks might sacrifice their lives (life?) to save that of another human. Sometimes the other human can be a total stranger -it happened, after all. I don't think anyone would sacrifice their life to save an item from destruction, even if it was the item they said they loved. I find this beyond absurd. Items can be replaced after all, even if the new one won't compare to the original.  

Now, I hope that you can see there are different levels of "love," at least is English. Some other languages have different words to point to the intensity of the feeling.  

So, what do people mean when they say "unconditional love"?

I also hope that you managed to see there's always a reason a person or an item receives our attention or affection. So, "unconditional love" doesn't exist. What does exist instead, is "love without expectations". 

You can easily say "I love you. I know we can't be together, so I have no expectations from you." This will put some pressure on the other person, or make them feel uncomfortable, however, they have some choice in how they'll act from now on. In the first option, they have none, they'd feel like a prisoner. 

You can see how this 'love without expectations' can be directed towards children and pets too. And I believe it's pretty obvious that when a person says "they love the item," they actually EXPECT it to perform the same for a very long time. This 'term' (if I can call it that) cannot be used in relation to items. 

Just a side thought from A. A says that they felt unconditional love in the past. They said it's VERY rare for humans to feel this type of emotion, because it's nearly impossible, as I tried to show you above. A does believe it can exist, however I personally don't think i ever felt it. I will not deny A's experience.

© Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

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Want to wake? give up these things

Publié le par Charly C.

Lately, I have heard many people saying "i'm so woke" or "he/she/.. is so woke! wow, i'd like to be like that".

However, there are a few steps to take to become "woke" - and gosh, can I not use this word? i can't staaand it!! Anyways. What does it mean to be "awaken" actually? hmmm, the way I see it is a state of mind in which the person:

  • is somehow above all the mundane things and events,
  • these don't affect the person anymore, as they feel unimportant
  • sees the deception of the world 
  • (the individual) feels wiser as a result
  • feels that what matters more is related to spirituality, food for the soul, prayer, meditation
  • may try to change their eating and shopping habits 
  • may act more level-headed

There might be other aspect and features I didn't mention here. Others might find another "definition" to the term. 

I don't have much more to say as intro, so let's see the steps. Oh, it will take some time until you become "awaken," so be warned. I can't tell how long, as each person is different. 

Want to wake? give up these things

STEP 1

Give up your TV, radio, news paper, and all the magazines. WHY? 

They're tools of mass brain washing. If this sentence made you laugh or scorn, perhaps you're not ready to awaken. And there's nothing wrong in that, as not everyone is meant to awaken. Please read this article I wrote about how annoying commercials are, and maybe you'll give this step another thought. 

You probably know that all the traditional media mentioned above transmit news that is approved (especially in certain countries), sometimes made up (yea, fake news does happen), and through the programs and articles they present and the manner they do so, they try to influence your opinion and tell you how to think. - and yes, i also try to do this through my blog, i'd like to think that because i have only the LORD and my conscience to answer to, i don't do things out of malice, or for my own gain..  i'd like to think someone will find my writings somehow useful.

But i'm going off topic there. The mentioned media can also decide how much to disclose of the info they have - hence 'fake news' can easily happen. The practice can also be called misinformation of the masses. 

If you have subscriptions to publications that are a must for your job, then keeping those should be fine. 

One last thing here - if you think you were only checking for the weather/zodiac/[insert whatever] segment, you could surely find a free app for it. But haven't you wondered why isn't the weather forecast always accurate with what happens outside? or the daily zodiac?

By the way, you'd also be saving some money by giving up the items i mentioned here. yay or nay? 

Want to wake? give up these things

STEP 2

Get off of all your social media! WHY?

Social media is closely related to mass media. But that's not everything there is to it. Social media is also filled with a lot of negativism, and toxic people. These two aspects alone are enough to stop you from awakening.

This is especially true for those individuals who react in an intense manner to most things they see or read. These people somehow feel that what they just saw or read has an impact on their own life. Although, on another hand, these strong reactions could actually be a signal that the person is quite ready to awaken. 

The thing is that some folks might fall under the pressure coming from their friends, no matter they're on or off line, because they're that easily influenced. Giving into that pressure, that can be more or less obvious, could mean they won't "wake" as fast or as easily. 

Again, if your job is somehow related to social media, then this step can't really be implemented. Perhaps, just try to limit your online presence as much as you can, by having dedicated time slots for specific activities? I don't know.

Want to wake? give up these things

STEP 3

Start researching and learning! WHY?

Do you know how those "awaken" people became so? Mostly by studying and reading. They study and read everything they can get their hands on. They do give the impression their preferred subjects are philosophy, religion and spirituality, politics, conspiracy theories, and on and on.

A person that reads a lot can only become wiser and smarter. It's really as easy as that. Don't be surprised when at a point you'll feel like you have nothing in common with your friends anymore, as this may happen at some point.

 

I think this is about it. some 3 easy (enough) steps for you to consider if you want to be a "woke" person. 

© Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

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How many Hanzi do I know?

Publié le par Charly Cross

I believe in this post I mentioned something about posting an entry on how many Chinese characters -hanzi- I know. This post is it.

I don't really have much to say about this, but there are a few clarifications I must make.

This list below shows translations for single-character words, but I do know a few that are formed of 2 characters. I will create a list for those words sometime in the future as well [ahem, whenever I remember I guess, ahem].

screen capture :)

screen capture :)

I included only the translation I'm more familiar with, though I do know some of them have many other meanings. But that is ok, because other meanings can be learned at a later time. I didn't translate the numbers. The meaning of some of these characters was easier to remember because several years back I wanted to study Japanese. I still have some materials for that, but it basically collects dust.

I may not know the reading of all of them -seriously, there are a handful with which I still struggle to remember how to read, but I know what they mean, or how to translate them.

The list is a little over 100 characters long, but I'm pretty sure I didn't include all the Hanzi I know. This simply means I must have skipped or forgotten to add some. I think that if you want to learn and keep track of your progress in a foreign language, then a spreadsheet can be useful.

A small notebook is a good alternative for languages that use a different script than what you're used to is also helpful because by writing the words by hand, you'll memorize them faster. Just make sure to write on each page the same amount of words if you want to keep a good track of your vocabulary. Using several notebooks might also be a good idea: one for grammar, one for new words, another one to pair words up.

Please remember that even though I started this Mandarin learning journey last year, I didn't have time to do it every single day. For crying out loud, I had some 3 or 4 months when I had a full time job when I had no more energy to study. And even this year, with all the free time I ha, I didn't dedicate it all to Chinese - you could say I'm not that serious about it. Mostly because I still want to like it, rather than stress about it.

I should probably tell you what tools do I use to learn Mandarin. There are several websites:

  • archchinese [learn how to write and read each hanzi, their traditional form, and more],
  • allsetlearning [focuses on grammar and you don't always have the translation or the reading on the page],
  • learnchineseez [learn how to write the hanzi, their traditional form, reading(s) and (main) meanings]. All these sites offer free materials to help your individual studies, but you might want to get a tutor as well if things are easier for you that way.

[I'm not affiliated with any, not getting paid by them - just the tools I used and helped me the most].

See you on Tuesday with an esoteric entry, on Thursday with a review, and again on Sunday with another blog entry related to my [boring] life. Bye~~


©Charly Cross 2013-present. All rights reserved.

You can buy merch inspired by this post from over here.

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Quotes can make you look wiser

Publié le par Charly C.

It is highly possible to have heard your parents or grandparents citing various things to you that became like a mantra. You probably never understood them and felt almost like an idiot - I know I did. However, most people like to recite very famous quotes, and while you should know who said what, it is time you created a little booklet of quotes of your own, to sound smarter and wiser.

Today's quotes are by Brandon Lee, son of Bruce Lee. But this is something he didn't really want to be remembered as. He wanted to be his own person, apart from his famous father. Sadly, somehow this is now a bit impossible to achieve, simply because he died way too soon.

Quotes can make you look wiser

"Because we do not know when we will die, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. And yet everything happens only a certain number of times. And a very small number really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, an afternoon that is so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive your life without it? Perhaps 4 or 5 times more. Perhaps not even that. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps 20. And yet it all seems limitless."

"You only have the burdens on you that you choose to put there."

"God knows the times I have found myself in absurd situations."

"The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering."

"A fight can express things people might not be able to say with words."

"Believe me, nothing is trivial."

"If you've ever found yourself pushed to the limits of your tolerance... you find yourself doing some things that, from the outside, can be seen as quite insane."


Most likely these quotes will mean something different to everyone. But all of them have something to teach us. They make us smarter and wiser. If we pay attention to some of these words, we might even avoid making some huge mistakes later on.

I'll see you again on Sunday.

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RIP Chester [Linkin Park]

Publié le par Charly Cross

RIP Chester. I wish you found peace. Sadly you'll never get to read this. :( This entry is beyond serious. Depression goes hand in hand with suicide. These two topics are generally taboo. But we need to talk about them, we need to learn how to read the signs. And we need to be more understanding of those suffering from these ... I'm not sure how to call them.

 

If you're like me, you probably have no idea what depression is. Or how does it feel. How it REALLY feels.

 

Sometime last year I read about a woman who went to a hair salon wanting to buy some hair products: her hair was a rat's nest, all tangled up. Poor woman thought that by getting expensive hair care the tangles will magically go away: they would not. Only a careful hand with a comb can do something about that. One of the employees stopped her from shopping and instead invited her for a de-tangling session. The woman only managed to show up a few weeks later after several attempts at making an appointment and then canceling or not showing up. the woman was severely depressed. so much she didn't care to wash or comb her hair.

 

Depression is also walking down the street and not realizing a car is about to hit you, or not caring if it does [this happened to me, but I think it was a mistake since i was really upset that day]. Sometimes I get the blues, and it can last for some days. But then it passes.

 

But you know what? Depression is like a weed that keep growing back, like some mold you don't notice because it forms behind some furniture. And it spreads slowly. slowly but steady. And when you finally see it, the only solution is to completely remove the wall.

 

Depression is like a worm in an apple, in a way: you can't know the apple is rotten until you cut it open. Depressed people are similar because depression is not only tired eyes and black eyeliner. But there are signs. Signs that a trained eye - or another sufferer- is able to see. Fake smiles, flimsy happiness that doesn't last more than a few hours.

 

I know depression because my partner is depressed. What scares me the most is that they have almost the same mannerisms as Chester in this short clip. Not to mention a very similar way of talking, intonation and all.

 

I just watched a few Linkin Park videos. In the end for instance, clearly describes depression and even suicide. I still have a difficult time realizing he's gone: it's unreal. He didn't really mean anything to me, but ... I can't realize what it is.

 

I even have a confession to make. I knew he would die - just didn't know how. I have some sort of a 6th sense, or psychic abilities, if you will - that's why I started posting tarot interpretations. Sometimes I just KNOW things. A few months back I started watching their Breaking the Habit video. In the middle of one session I heard a voice telling me he will die. I brushed it off. I am not sure I would have been able to prevent it. But those close to him could have!

 

People NEED to start learning about depression more. To recognize it, and also how they can help those suffering from it. Depression doesn't pass with pills - they just might make things bearable. A therapist doesn't always help - because they're also human, and they're not always good at being a therapist.

 

What could help more is for friends and family:

  • not to push the sufferer into unpleasant situations, by saying "oh, come on, come with us!" Instead something like "if you change your mind, we're at...."
  • not to act condescending, by saying "oh, you'll get over it!" NO they wont! it's not the blues, not just sadness, but deep shit. so deep your brain can't comprehend it. A "hang in there" or "i'm here" is sometimes much more helpful. this attitude gets them One Step Closer to the edge..
  • check on the person 24/7, like on an infant, like first time parents do.
  • read forums about mental disorders: they generally talk about depression as well. they can learn more about how sufferers hide it, how to deal with it, and so on.
  • understand that for a depressed person, ANYTHING can be a trigger for suicide - it doesn't matter how small it is in their peer's eyes. It could be as small as a Papercut.
  • not to blame the depressed person. see the point above.  telling them calmly something is wrong, but that it's not serious and it can quite easily be fixed is a better approach.
  • thanking the depressed person for everything they do: joining them for breakfast, for a group activity, or anything they have a really hard time doing.

 

Please, if you know someone depressed, DO NOT laugh at them, do not tell them they're weak or cowards when they 'casually' talk about suicide. Most definitely DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE tell them to 'just do it" because in that moment you just took their life away! YOU killed that person! Morally, it won't be a suicide anymore, but an act of taking another person's life! If you think you can live with that hanging on your conscience, then you're a psychopath and you're a danger to society, and need to be locked up!

 

All those people complaining Linkin Park's music changed, THEY KILLED Chester. and sadly, I saw MANY people lately acting the same way: laughing at various popular people, and thinking of themselves they're better than said popular people.

 

I hope Chester's family and friends are strong enough to get over this tragedy.


(c) Charly Cross 2013 - present. all rights reserved.

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