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Limits and Boundaries

Publié le par Charly C.

Hi all! 
Anna and I just had a conversation that led to limits and boundaries. I think i wrote about this topic before. If i did and i find it, i'll link it here - so, if you see no link it means i didn't write, i didn't look for it, or i didn't find it. 

So, limits and boundaries. 

We ALL need to have them. With EVERYONE! And, yes this means all the members of the family, all the friends, and especially co-workers and even bosses. 

However, limits and boundaries are not completely the same things. they differ a little bit and i'll try to explain them separately in a single blog entry! I'm not sure, but it could turn into a short novel, so grab some water, though you can always stop reading, of course. 

Limits and Boundaries
Limits

what i understand by limits is like a line or border [between countries] over which we can't cross either with our actions, thoughts, trust, or other similar stuff. 

Most of us learn as we grow and mature. In most cases, they're taught and drilled into us by our elders. 

For instance, we're told how we act around other children, dogs, and property of others. We're supposed to ask for permission before interacting with others and their property. We're also taught that certain actions have severe consequences, such as lying, stealing, killing, bullying, and so on.

Most of us are being told all the things we're not supposed to do are limits, but there's more to limits than this. There are some limitations as far as our physical well-being is involved. 

For instance, some of us could suffer from a serious health condition that prevents us from performing certain actions. Some folks are able to overcome their health-related conditions and learn how to complete tasks within their limits.

These kinf people have a great deal of opportunity of becoming an influencer and motivator for others that suffer from the sme conditions.

Limits and Boundaries
Boundaries

In my book, boundaries are other lines that represent how you allow others to treat you. 

For instance, these are stuff such as:

  • allowing others to use you as their personal credit card =you always when going out
  • not reacting or being ok when others insult you or strangers for whatever reasons
  • hitting or slapping you
  • bullying others
  • torturing animals
  • allowing others to call or message you at any given hour
  • having to explain every single move you made and why you can't reply the second you hear the phone

The list can go on. 

While the limits are usually well set, the same can't be said about boundaries. This doesn't mean we don't have boundaries at all: we all do. They just work differently with different people we meet. 

Those who come in our lives and we get along with well, will not cross the boundaries. Then others, come in our lives with just a goal in mind: see how much they can use us and for how long can we take it.

The problem is due to their ability to blend in like a chameleon and make us believe good things abut them, until it' too late. 

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

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Gratitutes for 2 days in 1 entry

Publié le par Charly C.

So this entry has to be a bit longer, than what i wrote in this diary, so 2 entries are coming your way. 

my blog my rules, so ... i don't know what to tell ya. 

august 25th

1. GRATEFUL I HAD ENOUGH ENERGY TO CLEAN THE FLOORS YESTERDAY. 

i had a period when i was feeling very tired. maybe it was the depression controlling me. 

2. GRATEFUL AND HAPPY I HAD THE INSPIRATION TO PAINT OVER A LARGE PRINT.

- sidenote: i found these 2 large prints from IKEA. I like one of them more than the other. i decided to turn the one i liked less into an actual painting, by painting over it. 

of course, this wasn't done in one evening, but still. I used mixed media to cover the original image. this is an attempt for me to curb my controlling tendencies. long story that i don't think I'll talk about. 

the painting is not finished yet, as i type this (feb. 14th, 2024) ... and yes, i can post in the past. yay, internet. 

3. GRATEFUL AND HAPPY I FINISHED THE TASK EARLIER THAN I WAS SUPPOSED TO. 

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september 4th

1. GRATEFUL AND HAPPY WITH (BECAUSE OF) THE YELLOW SKIRT WE GOT ON SATURDAY. 

that day we went out to check out some second hand stores. i forgot what exactly what else we found, but that skirt is really pretty and spring-like. i don't think it still fits me because i gained some weight. maybe I'll lose the extra kgs until the time comes for the skirt time. 

2. GRATEFUL ANNA TOOK THE DOGS OUT THIS MORNING. 

i suppose i was really tired that day. it is helpful to sleep for longer at times. 

3. GRATEFUL WE GOT A NEW TASK A FEW DAYS AGO. 

this needs no more explanation. 

icecream, chimney cake, dessert,
july 2022

A\ happy we went to the pool twice last week. 

B\ happy i found some paper, net, and a traditional bowl. it's very cheerful and beautiful. 

 

as you can see, the entries are posted in between the 2 days of gratitudes. this seems better for me than posting for one day or the other. 

the ice cream has nothing to do with going to the pool. unfortunately. it's just a dessert we had back in july 2022. I suddenly remember that the place selling this dessert didn't have anything to carry them home. the day was very hot and they were melting quite fast, and we were FAR from home. 

i had to go to a different ice cream place and demand for a container. oh, the drama i had there until the manager decided to take the money i was offering for the container. I was pretty upset and worked up over these incidents. almost 2 years later and this doesn't matter anymore. funny how life is. 

but seriously, if someone offers you money, as a store, you take it: it's in your best interest.  

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

Do you want to buy me a coffee? this is a 1-time donation, thank you very much!

Voir les commentaires