life experience

What's up guys?

This entry is not motivational, or at least that's not my current intention. What I want to talk about is what I noticed that changed since I started waking up early.

βΑ¢ΚŠτØℜϒ  - that should read backstory, in case you can't see the characters-

I work as a freelance writer for 5 and a half years now. Like most writers and freelancers I discovered that I'm more inspired to write at night - not to mention that my days were also filled with other activities and chores.

This meant I would end up going to bed really and I mean REALLY late. Think of 1 am which slowly and steady reached 3 and 4 am, sometimes even 6 or 7 am, just to finish a task.

I need to sleep at least 8 hours every night, so I would wake up not earlier than 10 am. During 2015 I would wake up at 1 pm or even 2 pm at times, even if I was asleep at 4 am.  This wasn't good for me ... mentally.

tip: ƒ¡ηР¡ηšΡ¡ℜα†¡Øη! - that reads "find inspiration!"

I also was [and still am] watching the videos posted by Grace about her daily life in Japan. I watched them and I started feeling ashamed of myself.

I'm not saying she leads a perfect life, but in my opinion hers seems more put together than mine. She's also a blogger and a freelancer, so I kinda started looking up to her.

I guess her videos started to inspire and motivate me [if just a little bit] to want to be more proactive in taking control of my life. But the first step was to control my sleeping pattern.

I needed a change. And the change came.

The Change - that reads "the change"

I decided I should search for a 9-to-5 job to make sure I earn more money - I really want to buy a house [=house around here means apartment, and translated to a place that I could call "my own"].

This type of job means I would have to wake up earlier than what I was used to in the past few years. MUCH EARLIER. Of course, that is easier said than done. And it also meant I would have to go to bed earlier as well.

I forgot how I started doing it, but I did. I most likely started to set the alarm to ring throughout the morning and to make an effort to get up from the bed each time - I would go use the toilet or drink some water. It did took a lot of will power, but it had to be done. But then I would go back to sleep and repeat till 1 or 2 in the afternoon, every 2 hours.

TIP:  If you want to make sure you get up at a certain hour, place the alarm across the room: you'll be forced to get up from the bed to stop it. 

While I did manage to start adjusting to being waken up throughout the morning, I still wouldn't manage to be in bed earlier.

However, the "secret" was to remain awake at an earlier hour: say, 9 or 10 am. In the evening, the body would be too tired to be able to still stay awake till wee hours. I managed to do that and it started working. My sleeping pattern started to slowly improve.

In the end I did find a job and I was forced to wake up at 6 am. It was still way early for me. That job wasn't meant to be, but I did learn some stuff, so it wasn't a complete waste of time. Plus I got paid too, so I can't complain too much - plus I'm trying to be positive here ;) .

†Η€ ρℜ€š€η† - that reads "the present"

Currently I wake up at 8 am, though the alarm is set for 7:51 am, no exceptions allowed. This means that even on Saturdays and Sundays I continue waking up at the same hour. I go to bed at midnight sharp and I get enough sleep.

Of course, I was forced to go to bed later than midnight, however I still insisted in waking up at 8. I only lingered in bed till 9 for two days [one of them being today] and I'm not happy about it.

I do consider that sometimes is OK to wake up a bit later, especially if there is nothing waiting to be done on the spot. I just need to make sure this doesn't slowly revert to my old habits.

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

Hello everyone reading this~~

Today's topic is cleaning - cleaning the house, that is. I decided to share some of my thoughts and observations after I started cleaning my apartment. This post is actually a rant - therefore simply my thoughts. Look forward to my next posts related to my observations, some "useful" advice, AND why I like cleaning.  [I'm not sure of their order though.]

First of all, I must say I am really bad at cleaning. I am a pretty messy person. Well, to my defense, there are people way worse than me and others who are far better than me at cleaning or keeping their stuff in order. I wish I belonged in this second group. Who know, maybe after I'm done with it all, I will slowly feel more motivated to stay organized and trying to keep up the clean state of things.

it never lasts for long

What I dislike the most about this chore, is that no more than 2 days pass since it's completed, and things magically go back to the way they were before the action. At this point I'm too tired and in pain to be able to start it all over again.

it's so tiresome

I guess, I was never used to physical activity, and even something as simple as cleaning get's me super tired. The worst part is that my spine starts hurting BADLY if I stay in certain positions for too long. The most common position is partly bend forward - used when doing dishes, using the vacuum, and mopping.

it takes so much time

The apartment is not very big, and there aren't THAT many things to clean. Regardless, it still takes time. I have to use the vacuüm properly to make sure no crumbs and cat hair is left, then I have to mop making sure no streaks are left on the floor, and then I should be dusting.

I believe it takes about 2 hours to vacuüm the place. Then, while mopping, I have to change the water from time to time when it gets too dirty. This might also take another 2 hours. I never checked, but next time, I will. By the time I get to dusting I'm too tired and in too much pain to continue.

the cleaning products are not that good

I will leave the vacuum out of it for now, and I'll complain about the chemical solutions used to actually clean things.

I tried several brands of floor cleaning products. The mop with strings leaves ugly marks on the tile floor I have. Granted, they're seen only in the light, at an angle - I hate that! There are various solutions I use - some leave marks, and some don't leave as many. None of them leaves the floor as shiny as the ad or the package claims. Same goes for the solution that removes dust off the furniture. Luckily my furniture is not the shiny type, but matte. I would die if my shiny furniture would become matte because of the bad solutions in the store.

What I mentioned above applies to the products used against old grease and limescale. Rubbing and scrubbing grease seems more effective than products for this purpose, but it's so tiresome.

skin on my hands becomes so dry

I tried using gloves. Several times. They broke within minutes of putting them on, and they were brand new. This happened while I was doing the dishes. Doing the dishes is a simple task I do daily [or almost daily, depending on the amount of dishes I have]. I guess I still have to try using gloves? or find a good hand cream for me.

With results that don't last, cleaning products that are not as good as expected, and getting all sorts of back pains, it's really no wonder I'm not THAT good at cleaning. Or that willing to complete this chore.

And you? Is cleaning such a difficult chore for you? Is it easy for you to keep up a clean state of things? Please share!

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

Last week I went out to have a drink and relax. I had no idea where to go and I just wandered around until I found this cafe called The Drunken Lords.

The cafe, or bar -as I'm not entirely sure what its label is- is located in the Historic Center of Bucharest. This area is full of cafes, restaurants, bars, night clubs, and even random shops, especially those selling wedding gowns. I may show some of these stores in a future entry.

I never went here before, and I often go to new places just because. The downside is that I never know how the service or the drinks are. I came up with a simple and rather sure way of testing out new cafes. I will share my observations with you, because you know, "sharing is caring," and I started this blog for this particular reason.

Check out the atmosphere of the place.

This means you need to observe "each detail." For instance, what do the seats and the tables look like? Do they seem comfortable? How many people can they accommodate? What type of decorations are there on the walls? Is there a funny scent, or is it too smoky?

The Drunken Lords had tables for two but tables for 4 or 6 persons as well. The  owner or the designer thought about using a combination of chairs and sofas [or couches] to appeal to the preferences of more people.

I sat on a chair, while my friend used the sofa to sit at the same table.

I really liked the wall decor and this is why I took two pictures of it. One of the walls was completely covered in these old books - most likely nobody would have read them anymore. Among all those books, some really old fashion suitcases were also sprinkled. You can actually see a little bit of one of them in the above picture.

I didn't take a better picture because it took me minute to realize what was I looking at, and was feeling self conscious taking pictures. On another wall, the designer used the portrait of a gentleman [see below] - too bad my phone and the spotlight were at a bad angle. I really liked how the middle section was left as it was while the upper and the lower sections seem painted over.

Check the bathroom

You may not need to go, but you should still go wash your hands before consuming anything. This is exactly what I also did. Having a look at the cafe's restroom is a great indicator of the care they put in serving their clients.

Luckily most of the restrooms I went to while being at a cafe, were CLEAN. They might not have someone to clean the place after each person, nor advanced Japanese toilets, but you won't feel like throwing up while walking in there.

I never sit on the toilet seat, but that's a different story. This restroom was not only clean, but it was nicely scented too. They have one for the ladies and one for the gents, separated, unlike many other places. 2 people can go in 2 separate stalls at the same time, and there were 2 sinks with soap and paper towel dispensers as well.

Can you tell I was nicely impressed?

Pay attention to the staff

Of course, many people would pay attention to the staff, and notice faster if the staff is rude or not polite enough. The guys on duty on that evening were all smiles and excited to talk to me and my friend. This made the experience more relaxed and much more pleasant.

There is one slight minus that happens virtually everywhere I go: when the order came, there was no napkin in sight! 0.0 I realized this when it was too late, and took my own out [taken from another cafe. When our waiter noticed, he got upset, but he didn't say a word. ooops] I should have asked for some, but I'm not sure why I didn't.

The way your bill is presented at the end is also important. Since you're going to a more fancy place, you should receive it inside a little something, and not just given in your hand. Different locations have different ways of presenting it: in glasses, inside small fancy looking boxes, or specially created cases.

Place your order

This step is one of the most important one when going to a cafe or restaurant. However you must be prepared ahead of time.

What I like doing is quite simple, and uses common sense [I noticed not many people still have it these days, sadly].

I order some drinks I really like and that are super easy to get right or fail. [Well, I also pay attention to the quantity and the price, to see how 'fair' they are or if they're trying to rip customers off - this is something that happens at times].

We ordered a lemonade and a hot chocolate with a side of a standard drink - Pepsi Cola [hey, Pepsi folks! can I get some change here for advertising your drink? =P LOL]. Pepsi was the last resort if we hated the other two drinks ;)

Lemonade is something REALLY easy to make. And it might sound ridiculous to some of those reading this entry, but I had a few places bringing me a NASTY lemonade. If they don't know how to make a decent lemonade, how are they going to make other more complicated drinks?

The staff at The Drunken Lords made a nice lemonade for me. Its size was decent too - not too large and not too small either. I also found its price rather fair, so I can't complain in this regard.

Hot chocolate is something that I had a bad experience with on a few occasions. This one was a good one, and therefore I have no complaints here either. The bad experiences were related to watered down chocolate, and the drink not being hot enough [at the same time too at least once], OR it being a pudding chocolate.

Hot chocolate is supposed to be like hot Nutella and a bit more creamy or liquid when hot. And the barista at The Drunken Lords did just that. YAY! [can I get some cash for advertising Nutella as well?]

All in all, I had a nice time there. I also liked it because at the time it was mostly empty, so it was more quiet. The music was nice as well. At least in the beginning of my stay, because I can't remember the whole playlist, but the music was pleasant all the way.

If you're in Bucharest, you should totally check this place out. This is their website.

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved. Re-edited in March 2018.

It's been a long time - my offline life changed for a while, now it seems to be back to 'normal.' I just want to share a few thoughts and insights regarding the life of a blogger [or a vlogger].

I'm not going to lie here: I read several blogs and follow several vloggers on Youtube. What's more is that they seem to lead a perfect or ideal life - it most certainly looks better than mine, from my point of view.

But that's just MY point of view.

However, I did notice how others seem to share this impression, but the reality is different.

The internet is everyone's tool and chance to become famous.  Or to at least get noticed a little.

Some people are more successful or lucky than others, and they become quite famous online. Some of them use their online fame to make a change in the [offline] world around them.

This is something I also secretly dream of. But I'm not going to put my hopes too high.

In any case, I recently realized that most of us that decided to share our experiences with the world have one thing in common:

We present a chopped, idealized reality.

And we do so because we want to inspire others to be better people and not do the mistakes we make. You could say we are selling dreams.

The internet is literally a shopping street, and with the right tools, some of us can show you our dreams while earning some money as well.

I did mention before that some bloggers and vloggers share their experiences and opinions as to inspire others as well. Some of them started their blogs and channels from a passion they had - beauty, fashion, gaming - or because they have a rare life-style - married to people from a different culture, living in a foreign country, so on.

Everyone wants to lead a better life, and some people are simply scared to do what it takes to live their dreams.

All bloggers and vloggers took it upon themselves to show the world that it is not impossible to live a [near] impossible dream.

It just takes a lot of hard work, courage, and will power.

They are showing the world no dream is impossible if enough passion is used while working. Some of them managed to start their own businesses through which they do whatever they can to help other people to follow their dreams for a better life.

A blogger's life is not perfect, because they are just humans, and there is no perfect human out there. They might have reached the "star" status, but even so, not even "stars" have a perfect life.

Bloggers choose to show the better parts of their life for two reasons:

1. life is too short and full of negativity and they [we] choose to spread a positive attitude and energy.
2. one cannot inspire others into become better and more brave by sharing the bad parts in their life.

I hope you can now better understand why the life of a blogger seems perfect, but it actually isn't.

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

(if you want to, of course)

This post is not meant as a brag, nor as a judgment towards those who don't do what I'll talk about next.

Being Eco-friendly is seen as a good thing these days. And why shouldn't it be? We actually take care of our planet by paying attention to what and how much we consume or throw away.

But what inspired this post?

You wouldn't believe me, but my kitchen sink clogged and my floor flooded as a result. The clog was well down the pipe, in the wall, and pretty bad. I used some products for this issue, and I thought I got rid of it, but I was wrong.

I tried doing the dishes in the bathroom, but it was a nightmare, and not very hygienic. Then, a better idea popped into my head!

Why not using the kitchen sink, but letting it drain into a large bucket? [you know until the plumber would come to fix it] I used the bucket meant for mopping. The idea worked like a charm! But there was still one tiny problem: the bucket would contain just so much water and needed me to empty it constantly. 

Of course, I needed a different solution. The solution was to use less water when doing the dishes. Said Thought and done! This second solution worked even better: I needed to empty my bucket more rarely. YAY!

I used the method for some 3 or 4 days, and noticing just how much water I'm wasting scared me. It scared me because I never realized just how much water I use.

I then noticed the same thing when showering, because guess what? A few days after I manage to have my sink fixed, my tub's drain pipe got clogged as well. I never saw the clog from the kitchen, but the one in the bathroom looked as if the ghost from The Grudge would emerge from there at any minute. 

I had to shower while containing the water in the tub, and then remove it somehow else with buckets, and what not. I almost never leave the shower running while using shampoo or shower gel. I removed about 4 or 5 buckets of water.

I think this is a lot. It didn't look like a lot, and perhaps other people use more water. But, do we really need to use 4 or 5 buckets of water? I think not!

For instance, sometime last year, they had to stop the hot running water, and it was actually during one of the cold months. I clearly needed to shower, and I boiled 1 big pot of water. When I used it, I mixed it with cold water, so it would have a good temperature. Do you want to know the result?

It was enough! I managed to wash my long hair, use conditioner, wash my body, and then properly rise everything off!

One thing IS certain: even if I mixed cold and hot water in a proportion of 1:1 I wouldn't have had 4 or 5 buckets at the end, but 2 big pots of water just good to wash my body and hair with.

So, what am I doing wrong? Why do I waste so much water? Anyone experience this? Talk about your experiences in the comments below!

© Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

And you should too!

This is my review for the Texan in Tokyo blog... and books. Too bad Grace gave up blogging. The site no longer exists :( 

"read" is past tense ;)

DISCLAIMER: Bear in mind that some of the links in this post are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase I will earn a commission. I used these affiliate links to give you the option to check the item out or something similar to it, for yourself, if you so wish, through a well-trusted seller. While I will be very glad if you buy any of the linked items, the decision to do so or not, belongs to you. Thank you for reading!  

WHY DO YOU REVIEW IT?

1. I really like reading it! And the comics are so lightweight, they relax me!

2. It has comics too! [see above, and below!]

3. I learn about different cultures! And I mean, I learn a lot of things, especially differences. I can compare to m reality and try and see if I could live in a country on a planet of its own, Japan. I can try and realize if I could have a Japanese or Asian partner.

4. There are 2 published books - and the 3rd is about to come out! - featuring some of the published comics and blog entries.

5. I forgot my other reasons :P

WHAT LANGUAGE IS IT IN?

The author is from Texas, therefore the blog and comics are written in English. As you can see in the featured images.

WHO'S WRITING THE BLOG AND DRAWING THE COMICS?

The author's name is Grace Buchele Mineta. She is married to a Japanese guy whose name is Ryosuke. I'm not sure how to read Buchele - is it with an H-sound, or with an SH-sound [like in French]? I don't know, but this is Grace' maiden name. So, there! now you're a few steps closer to becoming another stalker of Grace.

But if you really want to know more about her, go check out the blog, comics, and her videos! Grace uploads videos as well, on her YouTube channel!

WHAT IS THE BLOG ABOUT?

Grace blogs about her life in Japan. This comic here shows a major difference between dating in Japan and dating in USA, for example, but you have to read the explanation as well to understand the situation better.

Most of the comics talk about cultural differences: what Japanese people think is normal, no matter the situation, we, people in the West, may perceive weird or down right rude.

Her blog entries talk about various hardships she's facing and how she deals with them, how she learned is better to deal with, and self encouragement.

Grace also talks about her experience as a Caucasian woman married to an Asian man... This subject seems to be a hot topic for everyone having the slightest interest in Asian culture. Of course, each AMWF relationship [this is how you currently call this type of marriage - Asian male, white female] is different, and it depends on many factors.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT THIS BLOG/COMICS?

1. There's no color: I can use my imagination to fill in the colors. YAY!

2. I can relate to some situations. I can also understand others better when there is an image.

3. The writing style is so informal, like talking to old friends. Grace is one of those authors who writes the way she talks, and I really like this. Her stories become more personal, more funny, more alive.

4. Each comic comes with a short explanation: just click the link under the comic above, and see for yourself!

5. I never know what topic comes next! The chapters are rarely connected, and this is exciting!

IS THERE SOMETHING YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT THEM?

I honestly feel that sometimes, some of the entries may need more explaining. But I learned [quite the hard way] that usually more explaining is worse than little or no explanation. Most likely, Grace also learned this, and quite frankly, this is not something I would really complain about

YOU MENTIONED SOME BOOKS. WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THEM?

Grace said she has been blogging about her life in Japan for 3 years. She said she also has a lot of unpublished material, so she decided to make some books out that. She self-published, and her books can be found on Amazon, and even Etsy for those who want a signed copy! How cool is that?

WOULD YOU BUY HER BOOKS?

YES! I'd buy them and then start coloring them :P LOL - Don't judge me, I read yesterday that adults benefit from coloring as well, not just kids do. It's scientific [but you'll have to search for that article by yourself].

Truthfully, I didn't buy any of the books yet. 

Well, this is my review for the blog Texan in Tokyo, or How I became Texan. I hope you liked it, and I hope you'll go check it out!

© Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

through my diet.

Disclaimer: the drawings are mine. I signed them with my previous blog and author identities.

Hello there.

Everyone has body odor. It is one of the things humans and animals have in common. The body odor is used by animals and by humans for different purposes:

• to recognize one another - this is why dogs bark at strangers: they don't recognize their scent.
• to select a mate - be honest: how many times have you been attracted to a person whose BO you disliked?         I thought so
• to identify an ailment - sure, not all illnesses will change your BO, but some do.

However, as mean or racial as this sounds like, based on your race, you may smell more than other people. In case you didn't know, East Asian people are the ones with least body odor on the planet. Among them, Koreans take the cake.

Of course, genetics also play an important role in how a person smells like naturally. Science showed us how some inactive genes mean that the person will have minimal body odor. These inactive genes can be found in some non-East Asian people. There are many other websites out there with better, in depth information on why we have body odor.

But this is not all there is to the BO we dislike so much:

What we eat, and sometimes the medicine we take also alters our body's odor, and how strong it is. What I wanted to talk about was how my diet helped me reduce my body's bad odor.

Now, remember:

 

I still have unpleasant body odor and I still sweat, so my BO is NOT completely gone. It is simply reduced, meaning while I still smell, it is not as strong as bad as it used to be!

The first thing you need to know is that I have bad stomach burns when I eat certain foods, especially spicy or fried stuff. What I did was to reduce to a minimum these types of foods. That's because, let's be honest:  they are yummy! You might think that this has nothing to do with how a person smells like, but it does!

Think about kimchi, pickles, or sour cabbage: they're delicious, right? But, don't they have some strong scent about them? Well, that scent is carried inside your stomach through the food itself, then it passes into your blood, and then to all of your body's cells, including the skin. The skin sweats, and that sweat contains remnants of the stinky food you had. Do your biology homework, and see that I'm right! - or use your common sense-

Secondly, all that fried oil is full of toxins:  the more toxins you put in your system, the more bad body odor you release. Related to these toxins, I also gave up eating processed meats like hotdogs, sausages, and salamis. Ever checked to discover the real ingredients in these things? All I have to say is EWWW!

Then, I gave up touching and consuming garlic and onion. O_O YES! These 2 beloved aromatic plants were the ones guilty of most of my bad body odor. ;-; You know how bad your hands smell like after you peel and chop an onion bare handed? I dare you: try it out!

You probably have one question in mind right now:

How do you know garlic and onion made you smell bad? The answer is so easy, you won't believe it!

After a few months of not eating these things I randomly had them is some dishes I got from relatives. They had cooked more food than they could eat and they shared it with me. They didn't know I was 'dieting' and therefore not eating some of the ingredients. Any ways, I'm not the person to throw away foods without even trying them out.

I forgot if they had only onion (I know for sure they had onion, as my relatives never cook without it), or if there was some garlic in there too. In any case, the next day I could feel a strange scent around me, before showering. The feeling was BIZARRE, haha. It took me several minutes the culprit was my body!

Sadly, I could feel the scent even after showering! I felt it until the next day! I am not sure if by then I got used to it or it was gone. :/ What I do know is that I did throw away the left over food I received. Since then, I pay even more attention to what I eat.

Now don't get me wrong: I also don't eat onion and garlic because they're bad for my stomach. I was never OK after eating them: I would either throw up without wanting or suffer with stomach burns. I thought it was normal, because I imagined everyone was feeling that and they just wouldn't talk about it. :(

Later on, or better said, in the recent years I found out I was wrong.

In any case, reducing or eliminating foods that cause a bad body scent is not enough. You will still sweat, I know I do, and it still is unpleasant. I still need a good deodorant, though I prefer a good antiperspirant. Showering daily is something that should be a given and not even mentioned, along with making sure to wear clean clothes. Of course, this can't apply to those who consider water as a luxury.

I recently learned that  Japanese people, I believe it is mostly the ladies doing this, carry wet napkins [handkerchiefs] with them every day and everywhere they go. Apparently, they use it to remove excessive sweat, refresh and cool their bodies, and to clean their hands when needed. I think my summer bag will be a bit fuller this year.

How about you: What do you do to keep nasty body odor at bay? Let me know what you think in the comments below!

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

We all have issues with the way we look. We can never be happy with the bodies we got from Mother Nature.

We always want to modify something about it: hair color and type, eye color, get longer legs, bigger boobs or bottoms. Everything can go under the knife. And if we're labeled fat, or anything over that, we have to lose weight. WHY?

Because society got brainwashed by pretty looking images seen in movies and ads in which people on the slender side, were featured. They were portrayed as happy and functional. Now everyone seems to associate "happiness," "being functional," and being "thin" or "slender." Anything else means we failed.

I have an average looking body, and according to my BMI [which apparently isn't enough to determine just how fat a person is, but does help to some extent] I'm a person with a normal weight. I still think I could lose some 10 kg - don't worry, I would still be consider "normal" weight for my height. [In fact, I gained 7 kg in 2 months last year.]

I admit I kinda think poorly of people I see as "fat." I'm not shaming them - or at least I'm trying not to do it anymore. Because I realized I was being mean for nothing: it wasn't MY problem to deal with. THEY are overweight, NOT me. It's not me who suffers more because of extra weight, but them. They surely know it, and they don't need me to remind them of this.

I came to realize some people have health problems that make them gain weight. I get that, and I feel bad for laughing or judging those who fell victims to these health problems. IF you belong in this category, I'm sorry. I was ignorant and mean, but now I know better. Or trying to know better.

Sometime in the past month I read an article about being fat, and some of the problems associated. Well, ok I'm lying as I forgot what the article was about, but one of the comments stood out.

It was hilarious, and I wanted to be able to remember it in the future. You can read it below. Sadly, the author had no name: the author's name was either "Anonymous" or "no name." Their comment is not mean, but it can pass as such. In any case, you decide for yourself, as I copied and pasted as it was written there:

here's a test that involves just 3 steps to determine if you're fat - 1) get naked 2) get in front of a full length mirror (preferably at home but to each their own) 3) take a good look at yourself and ask "am I fat?"

here's a 4 step way to change being fat - 1) only eat healthy food (it's much easier to lose fat when eating nothing but very healthy food) 2) burn more calories than you consume (it doesn't even matter how you burn them, just burn them all day long) 3) get on a regular sleep schedule (this is much more important than many people give it credit for being and will also help with a plethora of other health related issues) 4) buy a year long calendar, hang it on the wall and circle today's date; then accept the fact that it took you a long time to get fat so it's going to take you a long time to get not fat ... but you started down the road to being healthier and that's pretty awesome of you!

Surely this method of deciding if you're fat or not will not always work. Some people have a distorted sight or a bad mirror. Asking others if they think you're fat or not is not helpful either: they will generally say something you would like to hear. Not very nice.

If you're a body builder or some other type of sportsman, getting on your scales to see how much you weigh, they will not tell you anything either. So how do you know if you're fat for real? (Actually you might already know deep in side if you're fat or not. Your doctor and other people might have dropped some hints about your weight.)

You might look at people who have a smaller body frame than yours for the about same height. And when you look at them you might think "how nice must it be to be able to move so fast without getting tired so soon."

But do you know what these thoughts are? Or what they represent? They represent self - body shaming. You're shaming yourself. By doing so, you allow others to shame you for your weight as well.

It is you who needs to stop the self hating and shaming first. Only then you'll feel empowered to demand this treatment from others. But this won't happen now when you read this blog entry, it won't happen overnight [though it would be really nice if it did]. It will happen ONLY when you realize the truth in these words and when you're ready to make peace with yourself.

I don't have a magic pill, but you have the magic pill. Better said, your mind does. They say that God works in mysterious ways, but the mind is possibly 10 times more mysterious.

I think it's time to think a bit about the other people. Those labeled as 'skinny' or even 'underweight.' Do you think it's easy for them to be that way? For some, yes it is, because of their build. And WE ALL need to stop shaming them for weighing too little.

They too have problems, especially those who go on extreme diets: they get easily cold when it rains or in winter. The wind could blow them away - hell, it nearly took me away on several occasions. They can get easily tired because their bodies don't have enough stored energy. The list could still continue, but it will stop here.

It is really NOT OK to laugh at other people no matter how they look. It is really not OK to tell them in a masked way, that because they don't fit into a mold they can't be happy. They can be! Many of them are! Next time, before you engage in laughing and pointing to a fat or skinny person, ask yourself:

• "What do I have to gain by pointing their body frame out, especially if I can't use magic to make them look 'better'?"
• "How does their weight affect MY life in any way?"
• "Will they instantly lose/gain enough weight so they'll look the way I want them to look, so I'll accept them?

I plan on writing some tips on how you can lose weight without an extreme diet or surgery. I also plan on writing about the reason I gained 7 kg too, sometimes soon.

Don't be a mean person, be kind and a better person!

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©2013 - present Charly Cross. All rights reserved.

Hello everyone~~

Shopping is an activity many women simply LOVE. Everyone knows that! And it takes them a lot of time to buy a cute new outfit, or a perfect shirt, whatever other clothing item they want.

Men, however, don't spend as much time shopping for the stuff they need. Could it be that they know better what they want? Perhaps it is so, but maybe this aspect has something to do with this fact:

Men's bodies seem made in the same mold, while women have a curved body. The curves of a lady don't always fall in the same places, but this is due to their height! Women's bodies come in all shapes and sizes, or so they say. This is why women must try on all the clothes they're interested in, to make sure they fit and look nice.

To add insult to the injury, the amount of patterns, colors, and items in general, is reduced for men's clothing, so it's easier for them to choose something!

I read the stories of many women complaining about how their shopping trip was a failure:

Some of them couldn't find something they liked, others got stuff they weren't 100% happy with, and and and. I think a shopping trip should always end with 100% happiness. I'll share with you THE secret to always buy nicely fitting clothes.

So, the question is, how can women go shopping and come back home happy? There is a very simple way of knowing if a pair of pants will fit you, for instance. All you have to do is to measure yourself before leaving home, and remember to take the measuring tape with you. You would have to measure the pants you like, in the store, before going to the fitting room. However, this is a rather complicated method and you would have to remember numbers, where to measure and so on. Plus, there is an even easier method you can use:

Take your favorite pair of jeans with you when going shopping and place them against the ones in the store! As long as they seem to be the same size, you can then try them on. If you're self-conscious, shy, or if a lot of people are in the store, you'll:

• save time: by not taking to the cabin pairs of pants that will never fit, by not getting into the changing room if there are no pants in your size.
• save face: by not having to ask for yet a larger size, by not taking 10 pairs with you instead of 4 or 6 pairs that actually fit you
• be done faster with changing clothes, and shopping
• enjoy your day of shopping for pants.

One important thing you should pay attention to is the rise of the pants: low, high, or regular rise pants will definitely fit different even if the waistband is just as large. You still have to try on the pants in the store before buying them. This way you will see if you would like yourself in them or not.

This tip can be applied to pencil skirts and even bras. It is well-known that different brands will fit differently even if you select the same size. This goes well for bras and pants. I learned this tip from my stylish mother.

See you next time.

©Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.

Everyone is searching for love. We all need more love in our lives. Love is celebrated in many different ways around the world, however one day in particular stands out: lover's day.

This day may or may not be celebrated everywhere. Lover's day may not be observed on the same day all over the world. For instance, USA has the famous Valentine's Day on February 14th. Similarly South Korea recently marked November 11th as Pepero Day, when people gift Pepero snacks to their loved ones as a symbol of affection.  Japan has transformed Christmas into a holiday dedicated to couples.

Romanians also have a holiday dedicated to love and couples. This is the Dragobete on February 24th. I will not copy and paste anything in my post, you can read the short Wikipage about it.

The article says that we should go collect snowdrops flowers and to give them to the person we love. Luckily, these days, if we want to do this, all we have to do is to buy them from people selling them on the streets. Walking through Downtown Bucharest is very easy to see old ladies selling snowdrops planted in tiny baskets.

What I would like to point out is the fact that this is a very old tradition, of about 2000 years. This aspect makes me think that humanity was always in search for true and long lasting romantic love. This thought of mine is reinforced by the many legends from various nations involving lovers who have to pass through some tests to prove their love.

What are your thoughts on love? should we all have a single day in which to show and reinforce our feelings for a special someone, or is it better to have different days spread throughout the year for more love in the year?

© Charly Cross 2013 - present. All rights reserved.